Finally the excitement in unto me! :)
We signed for our apartment 5 days ago but only now, as I'm packing lots of my stuff to take with me, I feel the w00t. With fun music loud in the room, boxes and bags all over the floor, a wardrobe growing surprisingly empty, and a moving date of a few days from now... I feel like dancing. I Feel like... like... I COULD TAKE OVER THE WORLD! [muahahah?]
Er, no. One apartment is good for now ;)

~

SY's far out south, making a living, and I miss him. The almost 5 months that we're together passed by so quickly. Knowing that I'll have him close by - living with me - in the near future makes me happy. For how long? He says forever, I don't believe in one. The now is great enough. I'm starting to feel the sulkiness I've been in lately seeping slowly away. So many ppl to see, things to do, stuff to arrange, cuddles to have with SY (but not only..). Yeah, seems to me like a good time's up next :)

So, uh, let us make this a-happening, ey? ^_^

Tags: commitment, random, sy
Current Location: Karmiel
Current Music: Calvin Harris - I'm Not Alone (Radio Edit)

One kiss and we're back to the case:
He's watching the movie, I'm watching his face
Those girl-like eyelashes
(Which I like very much)
A curl of hair, a glint of eyes
A boyish voice that speaks and smiles
A darkish skin that smells of -
Him
His fingertips along my skin...
He's moving some, to readjust
And muscles ripple, so I must-
Touch.

We pause the movie - it can wait.
We can too, but
Why would we want to? :)

~

I want…
More of the casual-touch in bed
More of the sexual-touch out of it
More time together in colder climates
More activities to do together
More activities to do separately, but around each other
More time together

~

Don't get me wrong, there's plenty of touch going on, but I guess it does feel like he has "proper places" for each sort. [Maybe its just cause we hang-in mostly at his parents place, and\or hang-out around his friends where he's expected to play adult-in-charge? :\ ]
Generally,
He's very touchy-feely [the more the merrier! :) ].
He cares about people, really, idealistically.
He's helpful, 'round the house, 'round the net, all around (:
He's wonderful, see:

We can cook together, discuss photo-shooting and editing and do it, go out on trips, go out to dance, [let's go out to dance in the rain!], stay in and watch movies all day, stay in and read, [let's go out to blade and take a shower together when we're back!], talk about stuff, people and perceptions, talk about what we want, feel and need,
[But please don't keep your thoughts\opinions about me and mine to yourself, be they good or bad].

We can be wrong, and make right.

~

So, yeah, the physical part matters.
And when my cellphone rings I always hope it's him, 'cause I love hearing his voice and it doesn't matter that we're both not the brilliant-est phone-talkers.
And when the weather's great I wish he'd be here.
And when he tells me that he loves me it brings tears to my eyes.
Maybe,
Possibly,
Cause I'm falling for him as well.

Tags: lists, love, sy
Current Mood: sleepy
Current Music: Eatliz - Big Fish

It used to be impressive.
It had a presence one could not ignore.
And I ruined it.
Lament and stuff, for blah blah blah.....


Yeah, for some reason I decided that having a bit of shorter hair would be a good idea. So I grabbed the scissors and started hacking into it. Then I remembered why I started growing it so much on the first place: I look stupid in shorter hair. And I cut way more than I wanted to. At first it was likable, amusing even. Now it's just lame.

I guess now I have to work on my body, just so no one bothers looking at the hair.
Lol, if that actually works it might've been a good idea after all.

Meh.

Tags: activities, decisions, random
Current Mood: blah
Current Music: Hair [Original Broadway Cast] - Hair

Got back from a double driving lesson a little while ago. That makes it 6 lessons. Going okay, I guess. I'm not a brilliant driver, but you just wait…
# of Casualties: Still Null :D

~

My Kitten (sy) was here (Karmiel) this weekend. It was good. Very.
I felt that he took notice of things I said. His touch was different, his attitude towards touching me. I admit it took some worries off of me, regarding our relationship. It's wonderful to know that things I say matter, that they have impact, and of course, that he's learning how I like being touched. A definite crossing of yet another Veil: I felt ready to take it up a notch. Too bad I was bleeding… I hope he won't forget the how-to when I won't be ;)

I don't feel like we 'get' one another quite right, yet it's far better than what it felt like with KA. I may have thought I understood him, and got the feeling that he understood me and what I needed from him, but it was pretense, or lack of experience, or lack of actual caring. Either way, not entirely understanding my Kitty after, what, 2-3 months, is far better than the "understanding" I had (not) with KA after 6 months. Because I trust the signals:
A. He gives a damn; and so,
B. We'll work it out.

Oh! Apparently I didn't write that anywhere: Moving back to TA will wait because we decided to move there together, the Kitty and I. That's gonna happen around the end of October, and in the meanwhile I'll be taking driving lessons and doing some small-scale, no-pressure studying here in Karmiel. :)
(I'm not good at multitasking major tasks, me…)

~
Interesting Sidenote: I've been thinking and referring to sy as "Kitten" or "Kitty" (in Hebrew mostly) for quite a while now. It never did feel right to use any term of endearment or even a hypocorism with KA.

~
OMG, I just re-read what I wrote till now, made me realize that I set my standards in comparison with KA as a sort of "mythological ex". Only, he's not. Not mythological. Just the ex and a point for comparison. :)

Tags: decisions, random, sy
Current Mood: good
Current Music: Boozoo Bajou - Grains

In a way, each relationship we choose to maintain in our lives is a bit like walking the Pattern. In my newest one, I feel like I've just passed one of the Veils. Suddenly it means more, he means more. Suddenly this relationship is a greater part of the things that define me.

Wordly person that I am, I think that words got us closer. Open and warm, but also demanding and wanting. Because this matters to him, I matter to him. But no, not just the words made the difference. It's his voice, his touch, his hugs, his understanding and patience. His pretty, stubbled face and the way he looks at me and smiles. He's a complicated person, but I think that I'm beginning to understand things better, to understand him better, and it makes it easier for me to connect.

Is it love? Not yet, I believe. Admiration, caring, commitment - yes, definitely. But there's still so much to learn, so much to consider, so much to feel before...

All we need is time :)

~

I can't make do without comparisons. The "pattern" of my previous relationship was different. It 'grew' faster, so to speak, over this period of time. Then I must consider the differences. KA had no previous experiences to affect his behavior, hardly any inhibitions, much less self-awareness and very few things in common with me.
Hmm.
I wonder if it was the physical part, being more intense, that made the greatest impact. After all, more often than not we're just simple machines: press here, release some endorphines, and voilà, you have a growing addiction :)
I might need to put that theory into the test, hihi :)

~

As for other matters. No apartment yet, and the Nana place didn't work out. Tomorrow: back to the hunt. Hmpf, I wonder how late I'll wake up. :\

Tags: love, psychology, random, sy
Current Mood: tired,cuz OMG look @ the time!
Current Music: Secede - Leraine